Pointless Rambling – Shizuo x Izaya or Izaya x Shizuo?
SHIZUO AND IZAYA ARE SECRETLY GAY FOR EACH OTHER. Like NO WAY! lol I know it, you know it, we all know it. Heck, the anime producers and the other characters know it – in fact, Shizuo and Izaya are so gay for each other, that said other characters are even wondering whether the two are having angry hot ‘hatesex’ backstage. This is the most popular couple the series has (go on pixiv or wteva, key in durarara, and i guarantee, more than half depicts the two being gay). When did Durarara turn into some gay shit? But then again, What be I complainin for? XD
The only person Shizuo ever thinks about is Izaya. 24/7 365, all that’s in his head is Izaya. One minute, he’s completely chill, taking a drag, and the minute Izaya shows up and prances around in front of him, the dude gets all passionate and emotionally charged and screams “IIIIIIIIIZZZZZZZZZZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!”. True, Shizuo wants to kill the guy, but when he spends all his time, free or occupied, thinking ONLY about Izaya, one really has to question whether he only thinks of the frolicking asshole as a dickwad he has to smush, or whether all that anger belies some much more homoerotic feelings. Either way, I’m for the latter.
Izaya claims to love all human beings. Every single one. EXCEPT FOR SHIZUO. His stupid reason is that he’s too dumb to mess around with or summin. Yeah right. Izaya totally loves Shizuo and shows this by showing up everywhere, always stoppin to goad the bartender and doing shit to deliberately become the focus of Shizuo’s crazy fury. If that’s not love, gad I don’t know what is then lol.
Though I can certainly see these two as a Foe Yay Ho Yay shounen ai pairing, I can’t fantasize them going any further than the ‘chasing each other killing each thing’ the two currently have – yeah it doesn’t even work in my sickass mind. I mean, picture Shizuo confessing to Izaya or the other way round. Or Shizuo suddenly snogging Izaya and the two then romp around in the hay . Or Izaya topping Shizuo. Can’t do it? Yeah neither can I. Okay, maybe it’s just me but whenever I try to see the two even kissin, the moment is effectively ruined when Shizuo then grabs a vending machine and chucks it at Izaya, or Izaya flicks out his knife and jacks it into Shizu chan’s gut. So yeah. Not very kinky unless you’re going for the guro thing but I eagerly anticipate someone coming up with a scenario that’d somehow work with the two havin buttsecks ;)
So now that we’ve ‘established’ that these two are gay for each other, there’s the problem of seme and uke: who’s top and who’s bottom? I’m guessin most would immediately go for Shizuo as seme as he’s a good 2, 3 sizes bigger than Izaya and the seme is generally bigger than the uke, but consider their personalities. Shizuo’s goes nuts when it comes to Izaya, seems hellbent on incarcerating the fellow into the deepest shit filled pits of Satan’s condo , and is too ‘simple minded’ to see the whole picture of anything, much less ‘realize his feelings’ for Izaya (given that they exist and said feelings prolly don’t cuz this is all for laughs) – in short, he’d be pretty fail as a seme in my POV. Now take a gander at Izaya. Personality-wise, I’d say he’s pretty seme, smug, all knowing, and is able to get under Shizuo’s skin just by showing up in front of him. He ain’t scared of the guy, always calm, and always goes out of his way to piss Shizuo off. I can see the two finally professing their ‘love’ for each other and the scene happens to go like this:
Shizuo: IIIIIIIZZZZZZZZZAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYAAAAAAAAA!!! *takes a swing*
Izaya: Lalalala Shizu chan!!*dodges blow*
Shizuo: I told you to never show up in front of me again you buttfuck!! Why the hell you always around when I be around??!! *chucks vending machine at Izaya’s head*
Izaya: Aaaah Shizu chan, you’re so dense lar! *steps onto flying vending machine, hops off it and flies towards Shizuo*
Shizuo: HAH?!?!*can only watch as Izaya saunters towards him*
Izaya: *pushes him down onto the ground* You really wanna know?
Shizuo: …?!?! The FUCK, get OFF ME-
Izaya: it’s cuz I like you ;)
Yeah. And Izaya is the one who lets the cat outta the bag. Izaya is the one who does the standard push onto the ground thing. Cuz it just doesn’t work with Shizuo. Shizuo wouldn’t know that he ‘likes’ Izaya and if he tried to push Izaya against summin, the poor guy dead due to the impact of his head smashing the gravel at 34578394759834 miles per hour. And I’m betting that Shizuo doesn’t even know what bum sex is. Though I guess he could still be seme – just an extremely dumb, crazy tsundere one – but it’s still easier to see Izaya doing all the shit.
I’m alright with this going either way, with Izaya being more likely to be the top in my POV, but wot you guys be thinking?